{"title":"Adults only","description":"","products":[{"product_id":"boo-you-whore-3-pencil-set","title":"Boo, You Whore! 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Obnoxious people in your class driving you to drink? At least your pencils will make you laugh!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eThese pencils have been engraved with the following phrase:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium; font-family: arial black,avant garde;\"\u003eI NEED A FUCKING DRINK\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e#2 lead\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eEngraved in USA\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eNot sharpened\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eKeep your office supplies amusing... get yours at The Carbon Crusader!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40610910208199,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/products\/image_c44e9386-c76f-4457-962b-8dd80e88e33d.jpg?v=1631563824"},{"product_id":"fuck-this-shit-pen-with-smart-phone-stylus","title":"Fuck This Shit (Pen with Smart Phone Stylus)","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eAre you entirely done with the noise and baloney in your office, paperwork, classrooms and every other area of your life? No need to flip a table and storm out--clutch this pen, write out your escape plan, and let it go! This listing is for one black pen with the phrase:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large; font-family: arial black,avant garde;\"\u003eFUCK THIS SHIT\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003ePen contains black ink\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003estylus end means cleaner screens!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003etwist open\/shut\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003efeatures a clip so you can wear it for a subtle hint to others\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eCustom options available in our shop!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eNo more boring pens! The Carbon Crusader is here to save your supplies one pen at a time!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40610925707463,"sku":"","price":7.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/B1E6DF88-A739-4E8A-A625-068602245D98.heic?v=1704941812"},{"product_id":"im-ceo-bitch-3-pencil-set","title":"I'm CEO, Bitch ( 3 pencil set )","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003ecolors shown on computer screens may vary from actual product. Thank you. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eFor all the people who said it couldn't be done. Shove it in their faces with these 6 NAVY BLUE pencils inspired by the social network and all the brave women and men who dare to dream.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eThey say:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eI'M CEO, BITCH\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eFor all \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e#2 lead \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eUSA made, engraved by us! \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eNot sharpened. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eKeep extras on hand for sticky fingered pencil \"borrowers\"...or send them to our shop!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40610931212487,"sku":"","price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/products\/ceo_bitch__96816.1479316495.1280.1280.jpg?v=1628037650"},{"product_id":"office-woes-personalized-pencils-in-red-6-pencil-set","title":"Office Woes personalized pencils in red (6 Pencil Set)","description":"\u003cp\u003eSome days, work is just too much. When deadlines escalate, meetings drag on, and emails never stop, this set of 6 engraved pencils brings just the right amount of humor (and honesty) to help you push through.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSet Includes 6 Engraved Pencils:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e✏ WHAT FRESH HELL IS THIS?\u003cbr\u003e✏ OH HELL NO\u003cbr\u003e✏ FUCK THIS SHIT\u003cbr\u003e✏ I’M SURROUNDED BY INCOMPETENCE\u003cbr\u003e✏ IT’S RAINING BULLSHIT\u003cbr\u003e✏ SICK OF THIS SHIT\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWhy You Need These Pencils:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e✔ #2 Lead Pencils – Perfect for tackling to-do lists, brainstorming, and jotting down things you’ll probably ignore later.\u003cbr\u003e✔ Made in the USA – High-quality and built to last, just like your patience (on a good day).\u003cbr\u003e✔ Laser-Engraved – The words won’t fade, even when your motivation does.\u003cbr\u003e✔ Unsharpened for Safe Shipping – Because you decide when to be ready.\u003cbr\u003e✔ The Ultimate Office Gift – Perfect for coworkers, work besties, bosses who get it, and anyone barely surviving the 9-to-5 grind.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🔥 Keep extras on hand for pencil borrowers… or send them to our shop!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOrder now and add some humor to your workday—you deserve it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"multi","offer_id":43851739201735,"sku":"","price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"red","offer_id":43851739234503,"sku":"","price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black","offer_id":43859906330823,"sku":"","price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"white","offer_id":43859907051719,"sku":"","price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":44887774396615,"sku":null,"price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Silver","offer_id":44887774429383,"sku":null,"price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/products\/office_woes__03757.1395552808.1280.1280.png?v=1628037660"},{"product_id":"none-of-my-fucks-for-you-pencil-set-8-pencil-set","title":"None of my fucks for you pencil set ( 8 Pencil Set )","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eNeed a pick me up? This pencil set will enhance your office supplies, add humor to the dreariest meeting or any boring lecture. With them you can write your most inspired personal thoughts or darken the teeth of your enemies in photographs. In a subtle, non eye catching color, perfect for a surprise laugh. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e8 white engraved pencils. They say:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003ePROFESSIONAL GIVER OF NO FUCKS\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eFUCK THIS SHIT \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eWHAT FUCKING EVER\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eFRESH OUT OF GIVE A FUCK\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eI'M A FUCKING PROFESSIONAL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eFUCK THAT NOISE\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eFUCK WORK\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eFUCK YOUR FACE\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003ewhite pencil body\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e#2 lead\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eNot sharpened\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eEngraved in USA\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eMailed in padded envelope\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eWrapped in cello clear wrap, ready to give or receive.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eKeep it fucking classy... use pencils by The Carbon Crusader!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40610935963847,"sku":"","price":10.6,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/products\/all_fucks__41944.1478806209.1280.1280.jpg?v=1628037683"},{"product_id":"zero-fucks-given-3-pencil-set","title":"Zero Fucks Given ( 3 pencil set )","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eAre the people in your life practicing their whiny, demanding voice? Did someone try to guilt trip you for not dropping everything to listen to them complain about the same problem they have shared 20 times a day for the last two years? You don't have to explain your indifference. Show them these pencils.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003ethese pencils are engraved with the following phrase:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eZERO FUCKS GIVEN\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e#2 lead\u003cbr\u003ered pencil body\u003cbr\u003eEngraved in USA\u003cbr\u003eMeasures 7.5”\u003cbr\u003eNot sharpened\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003eLet other no fuck givers in on the secret... send them to The Carbon Crusader\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40610942681287,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/C5636194-60E7-44C9-99EA-FFF5DDFEA5FC.jpg?v=1713390699"},{"product_id":"total-badass-3-pencil-set","title":"Total Badass ( 3 pencil set )","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e6 RED pencils reading\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eTOTAL BADASS \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e#2 lead \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eUSA made, engraved by us! \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eNot sharpened\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40610948874439,"sku":"","price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/products\/badass__45012.1479311214.1280.1280.jpg?v=1628037806"},{"product_id":"im-a-motherfucking-unicorn-3-pencil-set","title":"I'm a  motherfucking Unicorn ( 3 pencil set )","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eIf you're surrounded by people who do not understand your magnificent ways, all you have to do is clutch this pencil and repeat the engraving to yourself. You're wonderful, one of a kind, and as magical as a badass unicorn with a horn made of diamonds and rainbows on your forehead. Don't bother conforming, don't dim your sparkle. You're wonderful because you are you! \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003ethese pencils are engraved with the phrase:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eI'M A MOTHERFUCKING UNICORN\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e#2 lead\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eDark purple pencil body\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eEngraved in USA\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eMeasures 7.5\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eNot sharpened\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eLet fellow unicorns in your unicorn gang... send them to The Carbon Crusader\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40610957230279,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/A7BB43D4-6AC7-473C-ABB3-9346F51FA829.jpg?v=1706128709"},{"product_id":"toodaloo-dumbass-pencils-in-grey-3-pencil-set","title":"toodaloo dumbass pencils in silver ( 3 pencil set )","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eFor those times when you're entirely done with everyone else's fuckery, we present the following pencils. \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003ethese say:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eTOODALOO DUMBASS\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e#2 lead\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003egrey pencil body\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eEngraved in USA\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eMeasures 7.5”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eNot sharpened\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eFor gentle reminders, shop The Carbon Crusader!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40610979184839,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/products\/toodaloo_dumbass_pencils_by_the_carbon_crusader_2__99219.1506818387.1280.1280.jpg?v=1628038015"},{"product_id":"take-no-shit-give-no-fucks-stylus-pen-in-blue","title":"take no shit. give no fucks.  stylus pen","description":"\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cspan\u003eChannel your inner rebel with the take no shit. give no fucks. stylus pen. Inspired by the fearless motto \"do no harm but take no shit,\" this pen is a bold choice for those who refuse to back down. Use it as a reminder to never let anyone or anything hold you back, and to always keep pushing forward with unapologetic determination. Don't take shit from anyone and give absolutely zero fucks along the way.\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: arial black,avant garde; font-size: medium;\"\u003eTAKE NO SHIT. GIVE NO FUCKS.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: trebuchet ms,geneva; font-size: medium;\"\u003eBlack ink inside\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: trebuchet ms,geneva; font-size: medium;\"\u003eStylus means cleaner screens and more detailed stick figure renderings online\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: trebuchet ms,geneva; font-size: medium;\"\u003efeatures a clip. attach this to your person for a subtle message to others.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eTwist open\/closed\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: trebuchet ms,geneva; font-size: medium;\"\u003eCustom options available in our shop!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eBanish boring pens! Let The Carbon Crusader spice up your stationery supplies!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"red","offer_id":44574853038279,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black","offer_id":44574853071047,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"pink","offer_id":44574853103815,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"orange","offer_id":44574853136583,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"purple","offer_id":44574853169351,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"blue","offer_id":44574853202119,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/IMG-6643.png?v=1705351530"},{"product_id":"fuck-work-personalized-pencils-in-gold-3-pencil-set","title":"Fuck work personalized pencils in gold ( 3 Pencil Set )","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eWhen feeling down at work and can't find humor, these pencils know your true feelings and can help you and your coworkers laugh it off.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e\u003cbr style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eThe following pencils have been engraved with the phrase:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eFUCK WORK\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr class=\"Apple-interchange-newline\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e#2 lead\u003cbr\u003egold pencil body\u003cbr\u003eEngraved in USA\u003cbr\u003eMeasures 7.5”\u003cbr\u003eNot sharpened\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eAggravating work day got you down? Laugh about it with pencils by The Carbon Crusader!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"gold","offer_id":44603059863751,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"white","offer_id":44603059896519,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"red","offer_id":44603059929287,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black","offer_id":44603059962055,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"navy","offer_id":44603059994823,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"dark blue","offer_id":44603060027591,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"yellow","offer_id":44603060060359,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"school bus mustard yellow","offer_id":44603060093127,"sku":"","price":4.44,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/products\/fuck_work_pencils_in_gold_the_carbon_crusader__03870.1511634933.386.513.jpg?v=1714952750"},{"product_id":"fuckity-fucking-fuck-personalized-pencils-in-red-3-pencil-set","title":"FUCKITY FUCKING FUCK personalized pencils in red ( 3 Pencil Set )","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eIntroducing my personalized pencils in red (3 Pencil Set) for those times when life feels like a dumpster fire dating a train wreck stuck in a drama triangle. No matter the size of the fuckstorm around you, start with a laugh - it's the key to finding your way out!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e\u003cbr style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eThe following pencils have been engraved with the phrase:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large; font-family: arial black, avant garde;\"\u003eFUCKITY FUCKING FUCK\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr class=\"Apple-interchange-newline\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e#2 lead\u003cbr\u003ered pencil body\u003cbr\u003eEngraved in USA\u003cbr\u003eMeasures 7.5”\u003cbr\u003eNot sharpened\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eAnnoying work day got you down? Laugh it off and shift it instantly with pencils by The Carbon Crusader!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40611039641799,"sku":"","price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/products\/fuckity_fucking_fuck_engraved_pencils_by_the_carbon_crusader__62192.1530746654.1280.1280.jpg?v=1628038555"},{"product_id":"fuck-the-dumb-shit-pen-with-smart-phone-stylus","title":"FUCK THE DUMB SHIT (Pen with Smart Phone Stylus)","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eThere's only so much time in a day and so many fucks to give. The world is loud and full of pointless distractions, but with this pen, you can cut through the bullshit and focus on what really matters. Write down your priorities each day and cross them off as you go. If it's not on your list, don't bother giving a fuck. It's a simple but effective solution. Give it a try!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eThe following pen reads: \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: arial black,avant garde; font-size: medium;\"\u003eFUCK THE DUMB SHIT\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eTwist open\/closed\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eStylus end means cleaner screens!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eBlack ink inside\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eClip allows you to wear this pen as a fancy accessory--and let people know where you stand.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eNo more boring pens! Use products by The Carbon Crusader!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"red","offer_id":44565728755911,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black","offer_id":44565728788679,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"purple","offer_id":44565728821447,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"violet","offer_id":44565728854215,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"orange","offer_id":44565728886983,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"navy","offer_id":44565728919751,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/86743680-5208-4DDD-823F-C01B8D412AE7.png?v=1706060797"},{"product_id":"fueled-by-coffee-sarcasm-pen-with-smart-phone-stylus-1","title":"fueled by coffee \u0026 sarcasm (Pen with Smart Phone Stylus)","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan size=\"3\" style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eWhen you’re brilliant and it causes you to uplevel your life, with a but of assistance from the bean water  \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eThe following pen reads: \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: arial black,avant garde; font-size: medium;\"\u003eFUELED BY COFFEE \u0026amp; GENIUS\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eTwist open\/closed\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eStylus end means cleaner screens!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eBlack ink inside\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eClip allows you to wear this pen as a fancy accessory--who needs a tie? Pens say \"I am smart AND fashionable\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eCelebrate your brillance. Use products by The Carbon Crusader!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"red","offer_id":46647937269959,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black","offer_id":46647937302727,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"orange","offer_id":46647937335495,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"pink","offer_id":46647937368263,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"purple","offer_id":46647937401031,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"violet","offer_id":46647937433799,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"green","offer_id":46647937466567,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"blue","offer_id":46647937499335,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/IMG-6655.png?v=1705349189"},{"product_id":"i-can-do-all-things-through-spite-which-strengthens-me-pen-with-smart-phone-stylus","title":"I can do all things through spite, which strengthens me (Pen with Smart Phone Stylus)","description":"\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI wanna tell you that my greatest achievements were fueled by love, peace, and understanding, but let's be real, most of them were motivated by spite. It's like, when people try to bring me down, I channel that energy into accomplishing the impossible, and it's hilarious. Don't get me wrong, positive vibes can take you places, but sometimes you gotta use your dark side to really go the extra mile.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003ethis pen says: \u003c\/span\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eI CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH SPITE, WHICH STRENGTHENS ME  \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003ePen contains black ink\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003estylus end means cleaner screens!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003etwist open\/shut\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003efeatures a clip so you can wear it for a subtle hint to others\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eCustom options available in our shop!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eNo more boring pens! The Carbon Crusader is here to save your supplies one pen at a time!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42031744450759,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/2CCF7B57-5DFE-49B1-BD4F-F123466A6389.png?v=1708123299"},{"product_id":"rip-the-last-fuck-i-gave-pen-with-smart-phone-stylus","title":"RIP THE LAST FUCK I GAVE (Pen with Smart Phone Stylus)","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eThere are only so many hours in the day and so many fucks to give.\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eThe following pen reads: \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: arial black,avant garde; font-size: medium;\"\u003eRIP THE LAST FUCK I GAVE\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eTwist open\/closed\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eStylus end means cleaner screens!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eBlack ink inside\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eClip allows you to wear this pen as a fancy accessory--and let people know where you stand.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eNo more boring pens! Use products by The Carbon Crusader!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"red","offer_id":46647934877895,"sku":null,"price":7.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black","offer_id":46647934910663,"sku":null,"price":7.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"blue","offer_id":46647934943431,"sku":null,"price":7.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"pink","offer_id":46647934976199,"sku":null,"price":7.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"purple","offer_id":46647935008967,"sku":null,"price":7.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"green","offer_id":46647935041735,"sku":null,"price":7.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"orange","offer_id":46647935074503,"sku":null,"price":7.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"violet","offer_id":46647935107271,"sku":null,"price":7.77,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/83F712CE-87C0-4F5B-984F-86DC00F36A38.heic?v=1704942012"},{"product_id":"that-s-an-immediate-no-pen-with-smart-phone-stylus","title":"that’s an immediate no (Pen with Smart Phone Stylus)","description":"\u003cp\u003eEver had the immediate visceral response of not a chance in hell? This is for you  \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eThe following pen reads: \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: arial black,avant garde; font-size: medium;\"\u003eTHAT’S AN IMMEDIATE NO\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eTwist open\/closed\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eStylus end means cleaner screens!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eBlack ink inside\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eClip allows you to wear this pen as a fancy accessory--and let people know where you stand.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eNo more boring pens! Use products by The Carbon Crusader!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42228565508295,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/01F37091-899E-4A5C-9F3C-9B449D7C48DD.png?v=1705355052"},{"product_id":"copy-of-misanthropic-musings-6-pencil-set","title":"Misanthropic Musings ( 6 pencil set )","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eThese pencils are here to help you stay sane when the world around you went crazy. Nothing is more important than laughing when faced with the absurdity of the human world.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003ethese pencils are engraved with the following phrases:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large; font-family: arial black,avant garde;\"\u003edoes not play well with stupid people\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large; font-family: arial black,avant garde;\"\u003esomeone make the morons stop\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large; font-family: arial black,avant garde;\"\u003eI don't fucking care\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large; font-family: arial black,avant garde;\"\u003eBehold all the fucks I don't give\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large; font-family: arial black,avant garde;\"\u003eNo time for your bullshit\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large; font-family: arial black,avant garde;\"\u003eWhy are you talking to me?\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e#2 lead\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eWood pencil body\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e Engraved in USA\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e Measures 7.5\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e Not sharpened\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003e Help your friends channel misanthropy today... send them to The Carbon Crusader!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"red","offer_id":43115880054983,"sku":"","price":8.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"brown","offer_id":43115880153287,"sku":"","price":8.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"lavender","offer_id":43115880186055,"sku":"","price":8.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"white","offer_id":43115880218823,"sku":"","price":8.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"dark blue","offer_id":46647933698247,"sku":null,"price":8.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"random assort","offer_id":46647933731015,"sku":null,"price":8.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"yellow","offer_id":46647933763783,"sku":null,"price":8.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/products\/image_9e02ebdb-b6f8-41d3-b965-4028b5785f67.png?v=1678764373"},{"product_id":"copy-take-no-shit-give-no-fucks-stylus-pen","title":"Do no harm, take no shit.  stylus pen","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eDrawing inspiration from my personal motto to do no harm since my teenage years, this stylus pen promotes radical love and the need for radical boundaries.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: arial black,avant garde; font-size: medium;\"\u003eDO NO HARM, TAKE NO SHIT  \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: trebuchet ms,geneva; font-size: medium;\"\u003eBlack ink inside\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: trebuchet ms,geneva; font-size: medium;\"\u003eStylus means cleaner screens and more detailed stick figure renderings online\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: trebuchet ms,geneva; font-size: medium;\"\u003efeatures a clip. attach this to your person for a subtle message to others.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eClick open\/closed\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: trebuchet ms,geneva; font-size: medium;\"\u003eCustom options available in our shop!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eBanish boring pens! Let The Carbon Crusader spice up your stationery supplies!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"red","offer_id":44565698937031,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"orange","offer_id":44565698969799,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black","offer_id":44565699002567,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"purple","offer_id":44565699035335,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"violet","offer_id":44565699068103,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"pink","offer_id":44565699100871,"sku":"","price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/2F68704C-A3CF-4B31-9391-3F4CE398F3CD.png?v=1705374422"},{"product_id":"you-re-my-favorite-weirdo-stylus-pen","title":"you’re my favorite weirdo stylus pen","description":"\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor your best friend, sibling, or favorite coworker, the following pen is a celebration of that thing where when people get closer to each other they start being really weird with each other. 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Let The Carbon Crusader spice up your stationery supplies!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43660457017543,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/IMG-6464.png?v=1705422076"},{"product_id":"ths-meeting-sucks-pen-with-smart-phone-stylusi","title":"ths meeting sucks (Pen with Smart Phone Stylus)i","description":"\u003cp\u003eTo help you deal with the stress of too many meetings  \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003ethis pen says: \u003c\/span\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTHIS MEETING SUCKS\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003ePen contains black ink\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003estylus end means cleaner screens!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003etwist open\/shut\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003efeatures a clip so you can wear it for a subtle hint to others\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eCustom options available in our shop!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\"\u003eNo more boring pens! 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The Carbon Crusader is here to save your supplies one pen at a time!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43774616404167,"sku":null,"price":7.15,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/F71DAF29-C253-408C-BA11-6A997F1BB1BB.png?v=1708652873"},{"product_id":"creative-writer-pencil-set-personalized-pencils-6-pencil-set","title":"creative writer pencil set, personalized pencils (6 Pencil Set)","description":"\u003cp style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThese personalized pencils were designed to support and inspire any creative writer on their journey through the creative process, with all its highs and lows. Besides caffeine, shoulder rubs, and long walks, writers also need high-quality tools for writing. These pencil sets will surely make pencil enthusiasts smile.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"text-align: left;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eThey say:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWORDS HAVE A WLL OF THEIR OWN\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eKEEP YOUR PENCIL MOVING\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWRITE FAST, EDIT SLOW \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eJUST ONE MORE SENTENCE\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTHE STORY KNOWS THE WAY\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eLET THE STORY LEAD YOU\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eUSA engraved in Houston, TX\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003e#2\u003c\/span\u003e Standard lead. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: large;\"\u003eNot sharpened.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Carbon Crusader","offers":[{"title":"multi","offer_id":44011748851911,"sku":null,"price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"red","offer_id":44011748884679,"sku":null,"price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"black","offer_id":44011748917447,"sku":null,"price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"white","offer_id":44011748950215,"sku":null,"price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"navy","offer_id":44565735375047,"sku":"","price":8.63,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0587\/7003\/0791\/files\/B0C4317E-0193-4E5F-A2F9-841C851E2ADF.png?v=1726246458"}],"url":"https:\/\/www.thecarboncrusader.com\/en-au\/collections\/adults-only-3.oembed?page=2","provider":"The Carbon Crusader","version":"1.0","type":"link"}